The trigger could be any number of things. The project you have spent months working on gets cancelled without warning. A colleague steals your idea and presents it as his/her own to senior management. You discover that the promotion you have been waiting for is given without an explanation to someone else who you think is an incompetent jerk.
How do you react? Chances are these types of situations trigger an emotional reaction. It could be anger, frustration, or depression. Maybe you want to lash out and send a nasty email or seek revenge. Perhaps you withdraw and become passive aggressive and uncooperative. These are all emotional responses that are not viewed favorably in the workplace. In fact, emotional reactions like these can sabotage your career. So how do you control your natural reactions to upsetting situations? When is it ok to be emotional and let others know how you feel?
When we are emotional, we are not thinking rationally. Our judgment is blurred. So the first recommendation is to just STOP and do nothing. A quick reaction will more than likely be counterproductive. In fact, chances are you will regret the nasty email, the tearful outburst, the angry response.
Stop yourself from immediately reacting and do whatever it takes to calm down: count to 10, take deep breaths, go for a walk, or meditate. After some quiet time you will be able to not only calm down, but you will think more rationally. Now you can decide the best way to handle the situation.
Take your time until you feel your intense emotions dissipate. Then and only then will you be able to think clearly and calmly communicate your feelings and opinions in a way that others will respect. They may not agree with you, but they will respect your ability to state your opinion without emotional overtones.
It’s great to be passionate about your job and your business, but it’s important to know when that passion becomes so emotional that it can sabotage your success.
Have you faced an emotional situation at work lately? How have you reacted?
As the famous quote says, “Don’t make any decisions when you are angry”. Nothing beats the ability of a person to relax, calm and ponder on things before doing an action. Thanks for this good reminder!