I was on the fast track. It was just a little over a year since I was hired for an entry level position with a medical management company and I was promoted to executive status. I loved my job and got to travel and meet and work with wonderful people. I was good at managing others and excelled at my job.
Corporate headquarters was on Madison Avenue in New York City. We had just completed another three day meeting when I was summoned into the office of our SVP of Marketing. “I need to speak with you,” she said. You need to change the way you dress. It is not appropriate.”
“What?” I replied. I had a closet full of Calvin Klein and Armani suits. “What do you mean inappropriate? I asked.
“You show too much cleavage and it’s not appropriate as an executive of this company.”
Well, others might have responded sheepishly that they would certainly address the issue.I just looked at her in disbelief. What was she saying? My attire was certainly not offensive. (Maybe in retrospect , it was to HER.) My suits were all attractive and professional. I had enough self-confidence to dismiss this conversation as “her issue”. Was she jealous? Was she insinuating that I was successful because I was using my sexuality? Not MY issue. I never changed one item of clothing to please her. I continued to dress to please myself and had a terrific few years at that company.
Fast forward a few years and I am at the pinnacle of my career. I am in Chicago at the corporate headquarters of a Fortune 500 company interviewing for CEO of one of their heathcare companies. I am wearing my power red suit. This was my final interview in a long drawn out interview process and I wanted to “close the deal”. A woman approached me as I was waiting for my interview and whispered, “Women don’t wear red here. It’s not appropriate.” What? Are we back with Nathaniel Hawthorne feeling the shame of the Scarlett Letter? Apparently so.
Well, I got the job despite the red suit but it has never ceased to amaze me how as women we are always walking a fine line when it comes to professional image and attire.
If we wear pants, we are choosing a more masculine appearance. Is this what is takes in some corporate cultures to succeed?
If we wear attractive feminine clothing, we are often called on the carpet for using our sexuality to advance our careers.
Should we wear high heels or not? Pants or skirts? Should our hemline be above or below the knee?
As women, have we made any progress in this area? Can’t we just be our authentic selves and wear what feels professional and comfortable? After all, wasn’t Hilary Clinton chastised for wearing pant suits during the campaign? Was she judged on her attire more than her talent? And what does all the criticism of Michelle Obama’s wardrobe have to do with all her accomplishments?
Thank goodness for dress down days! Then we all get to wear jeans, no questions asked.
haha. I have never personally dealt with this, but it’s really interesting to hear what goes on at the top. I agree it’s completely ridiculous. You did exactly what I would have done. Be yourself and still get the job! haha…you show em! I think you’re right about some jealousy issues with other women. It’s sad how cut throat women can be sometimes. Re tweeted!
YAA Adding this to my bookmarks. Thank You ^_^
I experienced this today in regards to a dress I’ve been wearing for about a year! No cleavage possible (the cut is straight at the collar bone), the hemline hits the knee, the material is not sheer or see through. Got a passive aggressive note from the director, handed to me by her “assistant” (I guess if you REALLY want to be passive aggressive not only do you write a note but you make someone else hand it out). The note didn’t even say what she found inappropriate, it simply asked if I felt I was dressed professionally and wrote “dress” and circled it. I’ve been wearing this dress for so long and she’s never said anything nor has anyone else. Coincidentilally, she’s been hassling me all week about other ridiculous things while my actual boss (and her boss too) is on vacation. Should I add that tomorrow is my last day? Why are some women so threatened?!
All this “business casual” nonsense was just instilled to sell overpriced clothes to women (note I said women, not men, because men don’t pay as much for clothes nor are they as scrutinized for their fashion.)
We’ll be pretty darn liberated once we can show up to work without make-up, in jeans and a t-shirt. I say if it’s hygenic and it works, it shouldn’t be anybody’s problem. I know that in real life, many execs have nothing better to do than to waste time fussing about clothing.
It’s nerving and stupid— A truely shallow part of our corporate culture.
Okay……I love this article; however, I recognize it was posted over a year ago. I was recently told that my shoes were inappropriate for the office. I’ve been in that same office for over 5 years and was recently promoted to a Director. Apparently, men don’t have a problem with my shoes but some women do. My shoes don’t define me but this is me, this is who I am and it shouldn’t matter if I wear open toe, high heels or flats…….I informed my colleague that I got to wear I am today with the same “type” of shoes, they are not “glass” or “plastic” shoes or over the knee boots…they are stylish! I refuse to walk into an office every day with boring clothes and a straight black, grey or brown suit. It’s just not me…..I respect people for who they are and recognize that there is an expectation of women in Corporate America…If you notice my shoes, GREAT! I wear them because I like them but your focal point should be what I’m saying in that board room…….I can guarantee that they remember what the topic of the meeting was when I speak and if they remember the shoes too, that’s excellent! As women, we ourselves have the control to make a difference and not just “succumb” to the so-called appropriate attire that women have warn for decades!! It’s time to stand strong and proud in colorful and beautiful suits and/or shoes. If you don’t like it, look the other way!