I love to run, especially outdoors when the early morning chill welcomes me to a new day. I’ve never been a long distance runner except the time I was visiting my parents down in Florida, got lost, and ended up running 8 miles. The only two races I ran were back when I lived in Connecticut, one 5K on a bitterly cold Christmas day and another a glorious spring run along the beach. I didn’t win either or even come close but that wasn’t the point. I just wanted to show up and prove I could do it…and maybe, not embarrass myself.
I’m reminded of my love for running as today is the NYC marathon. Thousands of runners from across the globe who have trained for months gather to test their stamina running through the five boroughs, maybe not to win, but at least to prove to themselves and others that they can complete the grueling 26 mile course.
It takes grit and determination to run a marathon. It takes focus and intention to endure the physical pain, the heartbreak, the ups and downs, the injuries and discomfort from rain, snow, blazing hot sunshine, and whatever the universe dishes out on that day. You show up and do the best you can.
I think of women’s ambition the same way, for women face many upsets, barriers, pain and discomfort in their careers, yet they get up each day, perhaps take care of their family’s needs, and show up at the office, ready to work and take on a new day, hoping to succeed. It requires focus and intention to keep going. It takes strength and resilience to push forward even when the race seems rigged against you.
In 2016, author and psychologist Angela Duckworth, wrote the bestseller Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance. She argues that outstanding achievement is driven by “a unique blend of passion and long-term perseverance.” Grit, according to Duckworth, is a skill that can be learned and developed, regardless of IQ, and gritty people are those who typically demonstrate interest, the capacity for deliberate practice, a sense of purpose, and hope. Yes, it takes all that to run a marathon!
And careers require many of the same qualities.
As young women, we enter the workplace full of ambition. We work hard to demonstrate our commitment to our career. But despite that strong work ethic and our accomplishments, men get promoted early on and we get overlooked. It’s the broken rung that sabotages our early efforts to advance. We’re disappointed. We dig in and decide to work even harder.
We are persistent. We adapt and take on the challenge of how to better position ourselves. We learn it’s not just about the work. We need visibility, visibility with the right people. We understand the importance of building relationships and make an effort to schedule time in our crowded calendar to do that. But now as we approach midlife, we’re tired. We’re burned out from trying to get ahead and begin to question whether continuing the effort is worth it.
Perhaps we take a detour. We decide to have a family and change our status to part time or take a maternity leave. When we return to work revitalized and ready to get back to it, we discover we’ve lost our previous leadership status. We’re distracted by the guilt that we should be home taking care of our new baby. The motherhood penalty hits us hard.
“But I still have ambition. I haven’t changed my goals. I want to move up in the organization” we tell our manager. It falls on deaf ears.
Read the full article on Substack.com.
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